Grumpy Genius? Hilarious Curmudgeon? You Decide! We Dissect Andy Rooney Ever wonder what goes through the mind of a 70-year-old man with a microphone? This week on Elton Reads A Book A Week, we delve into the life, career, and written word of the iconic (and sometimes infamous) Andy Rooney. Through the exploration of his book "A Few Minutes with An…

In this episode we explore the life and writing of a founding father of hardcore punk, Henry Rollins. A man that dove head first into his life and has become...almost everything. He's a punk rock and music legend, a movie start, writer, television host, a producer, DJ, a reporter, an interviewer, and so, so much more.We'll also delve into one of hi…

Welcome to 1978! The year of Garfield, Van Halen, Lego, and a murder mobile named "Christine. In this episode humor meets horror as Elton embarks on a comedic journey through the pages of Stephen King's iconic novel, 'Christine.' Buckle up for a rollercoaster of killer laughs, and deadly driving as he explores the eerie world of a possessed car wit…

Great Expectations, the story of a boy who turns into a man while being surrounded by a**holes, gets the Elton Reads A Book A Week treatment! Join Elton on a trip down Dickensian way before meeting up with a prime example of Victorian drama. It's weirder than you think. The life of Charles Dickens starts like many did in the Georgian Era of England…

As a little break in the booky-book episodes I thought I'd kick out something different. Here's a preview of a series I'll be putting on Patreon. It's a limited series about The Four Horsemen of The Apocalypse meeting every Saturday to end the world as, you find out, they've been doing for millennia...and still haven't done it. This is the first of…

Content Warning: Suicide This episode discusses suicide and may be distressing for some listeners. If you or someone you know is struggling, seek help from a mental health professional or a helpline in your country, which can be reached by dialing 988 if you're in the United States or if you're online via https://988lifeline.org/ You are not alone,…

Jean Shepherd is a man with a famous past in the largely "Who the f*ck is he?" present. Yet, you've probably heard the gruff timbre of his voice every year since you were a kid and enjoyed his work for decades, literally. Born on an unspecified date, in a town that might be in Illinois or Indiana, Jean Shepherd made up a world that people actually …

When I say the word “ocean”, what do you think about? For me, it's a mix of fascination and abject terror. I'd chock that up to my innate ability to sink in almost any body of water and/or liquid...and my fear of dying in it. That and if I go in too far and can’t feel the bottom, I freak out a little. It’s because I picture all the giant man eating…

Elton navigates the action packed weirdness that is "The Devil's Black Rock." It's a story so insane it defies logic. When you start in rural Arizona desert with a prospector trying to make ends meet, and end with selling nuclear bomb material to Nazis, there's bound to be a lot of wholesale killing in between. If Doc Savage is involved, it's pract…

Batman, Superman, and The Avengers have the same bronze daddy or great-grandpa. One of those. The first episode of a new year and this one is a doozy. Doc Savage, a character that fueled the 1930s and 40s pulp craze, is beyond belief, which is understandable. He was created to be just that. Prolific author Lester Dent made Doc to be the greatest hu…

Join Elton in the exciting conclusion to Hitler's Holy Relics in which we find our hero, Walter Horn and his silent, but deadly sidekick Eugene "Stone Blood, Death Comes For Us All" Dollar, as they hunt down the perpetrators of Crown Jewel thievery! Intense interrogation action, while busting Nazis high and low--ALL while screaming, "WHERE ARE THE …

A secret bunker, a cultural treasure, and a special sharp stick that poked Jesus that could help you rule the world?!! Who else but Hitler would be responsible for that odd grouping of nonsense? Who else would be stupid enough to lose it? Join Elton as he recounts the tale of Walter Horn and his hunt for a priceless national treasure stolen by Hitl…

Enter the realm of what it is to be perfect or close to it anyway. Join Elton as he explores one of the only ways a person can attain perfection. It's not as easy as you think. APOLOGIES SECTION: Elton would like to apologize to the following people, places, and things: Major League Baseball, James Buckley Jr., Medical professionals from the 1800s,…

"What If?" by Robert Cowley is one of the greatest books you've never heard of. It's not fiction or science fiction but, could probably inspire both. A collection of essays written by historians that were asked "What if the outcome of one historical military event changed? What would happen?" What if everything you've ever known could be undone wit…

In this episode-- Bill Gates, King of Microsoft, and one of the most odd, controversial, and insanely wealthy people on Earth. A planet could probably buy, lets be honest. Did you know he wrote a book of predictions about the internet BEFORE it existed (well, the one we know today, anyway)? Being one of a small group of insiders who helped shape th…

What happens when a man with a hood over his head drives a car into a small town? A mountain of dead people and a prison sentence, right? WRONG! Find out why common sense never made the final edit. Along the way, are witch trials, blue boars, electrified swords, carnies, movie stars, oh, and hand jobs from relatives. There's that too. Join Elton on…

Freddie Mercury led a life so big he couldn't fit into one episode (and it STILL not enough)! In this second half: cocaine dwarves, smoking vaginas, The Sex Pistols, Bohemian Rhapsody, David Bowie, possibly the Queen of England, and more. Join Elton's continued ride through "Somebody to Love: The Life, Death, and Legacy of Freddie Mercury", a book …

Freddie Mercury considered one of the greatest frontmen of all was the living embodiment of excess. He lived his life moving at the speed of light, but the world, a disease, and fate would bring it to a tragic end. Join Elton as he tries to lighten the mood using one of rock & roll history's greatest and unfortunate son's lives. From Freddie's birt…

It's the end of the world as the 80s knew it and they feel...apocalyptic! Listen as Elton gets to know "Mister Touch" and his rough band of New Yorkers as they battle a pandemic. Plus, survival tips! GET THE BOOK HERE! https://amzn.to/3DsgYkr Contribute here: https://anchor.fm/elton-reads-a-book-a-week and here: https://www.patreon.com/eltonreadsab…

Steve Martin, The New York art world, Ice Cube, and 90s gangsta rap Pokemon; what do they have in common? This episode is what! "An Object of Beauty" may just be the single greatest book in the history of books that aren't listed as great books. Is that a confusing exaggeration? Yes, maybe, you tell me. In this episode, you'll get the low down on S…

Using "So, THAT Happened: A Memoir by Jon Cryer", we'll get into Jon Cryer's life and various pseudo feuds with other celebrities in this surprisingly sexually euphemism-filled episode of Elton Reads A Book A Week. Join Elton as he explores the inner workings of Jon Cryer, the famous Hollywood actor extraordinaire. He leaves no page unturned in the…

Take a trip through the strange world of male sexuality with Elton as he tries to navigate why men defer to their genitals, sex cults for old people, and why men think they're the best sex-ed teachers. Plus, a wasp loving doctor makes it all possible? In this episode, Elton slips down the sexy, sweaty spine of "American Sexual Behavior and the Kins…

An actor that was so great people were afraid he might inspire Al Capone to murder and turn Americans into communists; Edward G. Robinson. In this episode, we'll learn what it takes to make it as an actor in a world that screams "Hell no, ugly!", that some old movies have sketchy titles and the importance of Edward's "third leg". [And a "mummer" is…

Elton finds out a little bit more about the how's and why's of his travels in time (hey, that rhymed...and that did too!) Plus, Dean Koontz's time travel rules are right (well, some of them). Part 2 of the "Lightning" by Dean Koontz episode. After talking about the book Elton converses with the stranger that appeared before him in part one. As it h…

What if your life was, literally, supposed to be different? What if you had a "guardian angel" that was real...and never aged? Dean Koontz can answer those questions and in this two-part episode, Elton gets into the life of Dean Koontz and his book "Lightning" to find those answers...and also find out why he's been jumping around in time himself. T…

"UFOs The Public Deceived" by Philip J. Klass, a book hell-bent on ripping UFOlogists a new a**hole, takes apart UFO claims, but is that all? Elton's journey into thrift books takes him into the rollercoaster world of debunking UFOs. Venture into the world of UFOlogists, the book, the aliens, the opportunists, and lies. Plus, there's an alien at th…

Time Traveling Elton (Titty) arrives in time to play substitute on the episode for "Successful Living", a book (that's not a book) produced by an accredited college funded by a radio televangelist apocalypse prophet, to help improve lives...1970s style. It's best to not dwell on it...or you could get cancer while having a heart attack. If you enjoy…

Sorry, I didn't think the audio in the last version was good enough. I messed with it and hopefully, it's better. Sorry about that, folks. Elton talks about "Living History" by Hillary Rodham Clinton while trying to remain apolitical, gets help from the Angel of Death, and uses a future recording from space to get an episode. Poor Ensign Swift. Rat…

What's wrong with marrying a time traveler? Elton breaks down Audrey Niffenegger's legendary debut while also confronting a time-traveling version of himself. Get ready for some 80s era stripper talk, literal self-loathing, and what may or may not be a "hoot" in this self-aware episode of Elton Reads A Book A Week. If you like "Elton Reads A Book A…

Elton hits the bar to drown a depressing night when, while there he meets a mysterious man who wants to discuss a book he's recently read, all the while concealing his...true intentions.Music by Kevin MacLeod (https://incompetech.com/)Additional music by Unheard Music Concepts (www.unheardmusicconcepts.com)License: CC BY (http://creativecommons.org…

Abducted, tied to a chair to wake up in a dank warehouse in the middle of nowhere can be tough, especially when being interrogated via speaker about a Pete Townshend book you'd recently read. Pete Townshend is the legendary guitar player for the band 'The Who' of course, and the person tied to the chair...is Elton. Will he live? Will he die? Will h…

"The Science of Evil" by Simon Baron-Cohen, a psychology book about "lack of empathy" being interpreted as "evil" that was so good, it inspired a game show that tortures a contestant with farts, hornets, and much, much more. Oh, and it's spelled "Rikishi", so feel free to Google...and be...AMAZED.I'd also like to thank Nate Winters for the writing …

In this episode, Elton talks to kids, the Angel of Death, and Ed Sullivan himself to discover why Ed's Christmas book is so oddly morbid and death-ridden. So, you know, it's a family episode, but for adults; adults with death issues...and Christmas. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/elton-reads-a-book-a-week/messa…

This episode is about The Founding Fathers, a time traveling jack-in-the-box invented by Benjamin Franklin, and a bong. Yep.No joke.--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/elton-reads-a-book-a-week/message

Elton uses his depreciated cunning, lack of wit, and The Reader's Digest Legal Question & Answer Book to construct a sound legal defense, in hopes of fending off imprisonment...for a crime he may--or may not have commited."Hard Boiled" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.o…

ERABAW - Episode 006 - Judy Garland by Anne EdwardsA painfully good book about the life, consumption, and death of Judy Garland I found on a shelf in a Goodwill store. The perfect read for traffic jams, Coors Light commercial shoots, Bar and Bat Mitzvahs.https://www.facebook.com/EltonReadsTooMuch/https://twitter.com/Eltonreadsalothttps://www.instag…

ERABAW - Episode 005 - Tower of Basel by Adam LeborA crazy book about an actual secret bank that...may just rule the world.https://www.patreon.com/eltonreadsabookaweekhttps://www.facebook.com/EltonReadsTooMuch/https://www.instagram.com/eltonreadsabookaweek/https://twitter.com/eltonreadsalot--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com…

The wonderful world of the brain partially reveals itself in this disturbingly funny take on a medical textbook. Yeah. A muthaf#ckin' medical textbook. Listen, enjoy, and repeat the phrase, "Better this chump, than me." He'll take it. He's easy like that.--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/elton-reads-a-book-a-week/…

ERABAW - Episode 3 - The Spy by James Fenimore CooperOh, the fun filled world of Revolutionary War spies. Can it be more wicked? Maybe, if the women would just...stop...crying. Listen to the latest episode of Elton Reads A Book A Week...The Spy.Contribute here: https://www.patreon.com/eltonreadsabookaweekFollow the podcast here: https://www.faceboo…

This week's episode enters the wonderful world of flatness with 3 time Pulitzer Prize winning author Thomas Friedman. It's connected with connections all over connected...dom. You'll like it.Friends of the podcast contribute and support the love here:https://www.patreon.com/eltonreadsabookaweekMessages for the podcast write their love here:https://…