I migliori Self Regulation podcast (2024)

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Ep 65 Breaking Free from the Habit of Mind with Creativity and Well Formed Outcomes 28:06

6d ago28:06

28:06

Our day to day mindset is a symptom of our patterns of behavior and is also a template of what our underlying thoughts are that drive us to do what we do. Creativity and fulfillment are things we seek but, the gravity and conceptual magnetism, our beliefs, expectations and predictions from the foundations of our life keep us in the same holding pat…

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Ep 64 Relaxing into Pain, Painful Beliefs, Actual Pain and Pain as an Opinion 24:30

16d ago24:30

24:30

At times we have painful events in our lives. Physical pain, mental, emotional pain and expectations of pain. Often beliefs and expectation of painful events and natural feelings of self preservation arise and often we may avoid places, people and things. The belief of pain and expectation of worsening or escalating of bad circumstances that are en…

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Ep 63 Is It True Is It Necessary Is It Kind: the Three Gates for Self Regulation 23:16

23d ago23:16

23:16

The three gates resonate with many but are three useful tools for self regulation and for seeding kindness into the social mileu of everyday life. At times we may be tired and the three gates can help us to be mindful of what we say and what we do while keeping in mind what we may be setting into motion. Are we setting kindness and understanding in…

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Ep 62 The Voice that No-one Hears and the Words that Shape What We Believe to Be Real 22:18

1M ago22:18

22:18

We have a very personal inner voice that we keep to ourselves that no one in this life will ever hear. However, the result of the that voice is part of our filter, our social brakes on those things that would be mistakes, errors of social faux pas that would alter expected or predicted outcomes. It is the voice that throttles the authentic self and…

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Ep 61 Altruism, Stress Reactivity, Grace, Compassion and Patience with Self 21:43

1M ago21:43

21:43

Altruism is a very deep concept but is one that we practice intermittently throughout our days, our lives in our social interactions with others. This being the case, we often view how we interact with others from a perspective from ourselves outward toward others. But, we often fail to apply the altruistic, compassionate and patient acceptance tow…

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EP 60 Fear Driven and Anger Driven Impulsivity, Aggression and Self Control in Everyday Life 23:43

2M ago23:43

23:43

The idea of Self Control rings more subjective cognitive bells in the realm of belief and certainly where we identify with those beliefs where we take insult based on words alone. The actuality of threat or the perception of what appears to be threatening or an indicator of threat to another can bring us to a point of affective, emotional priming e…

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Ep 59 Don't Make Mistakes You Can't Afford and How We Skew the Data with Self Confirming Bias 22:03

2M ago22:03

22:03

Many mistakes can be avoided and should be. However, in the process of life there are small things, little "Pecadillos" that are allowable in getting closer to the goal. Often by recognizing what we come to a situation or problem with is often overlooked and then our focus becomes on what we lack versus what is occurring in the moment stealing powe…

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Ep 58 Controlling our Spoken Word, Impulsive Speech and How Timing is Everything in Communication 22:47

2M ago22:47

22:47

We are experiencing an epidemic increase in impulsive speech and people acting and speaking in ways that is done for attention and views but is also translating into people repeating in "real", actual in person communications in person as if their is a protection of impunity. When interacting with people we must take into consideration that there a…

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Ep 57 Neuroplasticity, Observational Learning and Synaptic Connections 24:04

2M ago24:04

24:04

During any skills that we learn there is a neurocognitive component involved. As much as we have a thought process involved in the process of learning, a subjective component, we have a tangible neurological component that becomes active during the development of skills both cognitive and motor learning in physical skills applied in our objective w…

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Ep 56 When Fantasy Meets Reality, Concept Failure, Application Failure and Delusional Thinking 26:15

2M ago26:15

26:15

When under stress we often can quickly come to conclusions and develop beliefs without evidence beyond strong emotions that support the development of opinion. At times we assume beliefs and this is in line with our human tendency to be efficient and to save energy from unnecessary in-depth thinking which from a paleolithic lens makes sense. Conser…

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Ep 55 Social Reward the Promise of Acceptance and Primal Behavioral Influences 26:34

2M ago26:34

26:34

When groups of people congregate we size each other up, develop a pecking order and determine the value of what each individual brings to the group or to the individual in charge of or leading a group. The value of self is important in self regulation as this can insulate the potential influence of a person or group of persons that may be trying to…

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Ep 54 Ask What Not Why and Recognition of Communication Failure 23:24

3M ago23:24

23:24

The elements of factual communication and rapport building are enhanced by using the factual method of gathering information by asking; what, where, when, who and how before asking why. Using the five factual elemental approach helps one avoid the traps of opinion and emotional load and discourages defensiveness and the need to justify which become…

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Ep 53 Extreme Emotions Shape Beliefs and Expectations and How Patterns Often Lie 25:28

3M ago25:28

25:28

Extreme emotions like regular level emotions are transient states, not long enduring traits. The shaping of beliefs and expectations however would make emotions feel like a an enduring trait over time. This is where in a negative sense, patterned behaviors may occur more often in an individual and therefore more predictable and supportive of the ad…

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Ep 52 I'll Believe it When I See it and How My Body State Determines How and What I See and Believe 25:04

3M ago25:04

25:04

Frequently in a busy life we overlook the factors that shape not only what we believe as fact or true but how intensely we may believe what we are shown or see. Often what we see hinges on what we hear and are told by our peers, family and authorities in our lives. The prevailing social tone in a conversation or group atmosphere or the prevailing s…

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Ep 51 Time, Body State and Emotional Load. How I Can Derail Negative Emotions Fast 26:15

3M ago26:15

26:15

Time is an important component of regulating and controlling emotions in life situations. We have a short window of time to work with but, if we can resist the temptation of acting on our emotion immediately, we open a whole new world of opportunity to choose and act in a way that does not lead to calamity, discontent or worse. Walk well.…

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Ep 50 Unconscious Feeling Triggers and When We Tend to See Things as Wholes 23:11

4M ago23:11

23:11

When under stress our ability to rationalize and reason is compromised due to the environmental priorities that require we be stronger and faster than smarter or more socially acceptable. When we are in a rapid and fast changing environment our perception becomes our primary information receiver and can also influence how we interpret information i…

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Ep 48 We Will Until Death and the Over-valued Higher Cortex Under Stress 22:01

4M ago22:01

22:01

When we get to the ends of our endurance and the limits of our capacity in the physical sense, we impact our ability to reason and rationalize and possibly put ourselves in a belief state where we, our EGO will somehow continue. The limits of our will resides in our blood flow carrying glucose to fuel the process of thought and oxygen to enliven ou…

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Ep 49 Absolute Value of Self and Realizing Who We Must Become 23:29

4M ago23:29

23:29

The process of becoming who we must become is an adage of Abraham Maslow's in his approach to developmental psychology and in his hierarchy of needs he tipped a researcher's hat to the reality of our biological needs in pursuit of self realization. We must recognize the transience of not only our activities, and jobs in pursuit of goals but also re…

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Ep 47 Someday, Oneday, to Day One as a Principle for Skill and Goal Acquisition 22:30

4M ago22:30

22:30

When seeking to gain skills or achieving goals both personal and professional, how we orient and relate to the goal plays a powerful role in moving towards the desired goal or not starting the journey at all. How our mind sees our self in relation to the goals and their realization and acquisition also determines the quality of the journey and how …

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Ep46 The Power of Self Image Changing the Body and Mind Beliefs for Achieving Goals 26:27

4M ago26:27

26:27

The Power of our self image, no matter how subjective can drive lasting change. The idea of ourselves relates powerfully to what I envision as my goals for self whether it be gaining physical skills, or professional successes. How we "talk" to ourselves can sabotage what we are trying to achieve. If you dwell on the speedbumps and ask "how can I be…

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Ep 45 Mindsight Blind: Aphantasia and Inability to Visualize or Imagine? 21:54

4M ago21:54

21:54

Aphantasia is known to occur in a small percentage of people and essentially means that they cannot visualize things in their mind's eye. This may have been an adaptive response to occluded, occulted and limited light conditions as the other perceptions are engaged more fully and the brain scans show even executive engagement when attempting visual…

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Ep 44 Intrusive Thoughts and How to Manage Them When They Happen 25:45

5M ago25:45

25:45

Intrusive thoughts can be intense and uncomfortable. But, they don't have to derail your life or make you feel guilty or ashamed for having them. In a human life they occur and one does not have to punish oneself because you had one or several. It is our way of human thinking that is apt to use expedients to quickly address and categorize all thoug…

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Ep 43 Dissolving Ego and Loss of Self in New Parents; the Internal Stressors of New Parents 31:12

5M ago31:12

31:12

When one becomes a parent the reality of what is involved in caring for a newborn is vast, daunting and overwhelming to a new parent, both male and female. New moms and dads are encouraged and supported for the outside care and parenting behaviors but, the dark and painful feelings of inadequacy, the outward act of being able to handle parenting ea…

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Ep 42 When Change is a Survival Advantage and How Time Takes It Away 25:28

5M ago25:28

25:28

Change is the common focus in our lives. Often on social media and in our day to day communication we discuss and complain of how things change and we hearken to how things used to be and how things will never be the same again. We in our fleeting perspective of miss the constants in pursuit of those things that change. Constants are the things we …

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Ep 41 Endless Variation Never Surprised: Change is the only Constant, and Constants Never Surprise 24:43

5M ago24:43

24:43

The principle of change as a constant in life as it is recognized in mathematics is a wise and strategic application of principle that helps to limit the impact that dynamic social change has on us as individuals. The application of the principles of "Endless Variation Never Surprised" and "Constants never surprise" give us a guiding perspective on…

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Ep 40 Aligning With Power Versus Force Being Powerful in Your Life 24:18

6M ago24:18

24:18

Alignment with Power is aligning with a principle of power and such as love, compassion, and altruistic acceptance of others and in service and benefit to others in a larger sense like Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Martin Luther King and numerous historical beings that have also walked our Earth in service. By their alignment they created change and infl…

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Ep 39 Know Your Enemy and Know Yourself and Peril Reduction in a Modern Life 25:45

6M ago25:45

25:45

Self knowledge is invariably one of the most useful skills when dealing with and managing physical stress and perilous environment. The skills that support self knowledge is knowledge of "enemy", opponent, challenge or physical environment. Foreknowledge of the intra-personal and the interpersonal on the individual level is key to greater more reli…

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Ep 38 Captain of My Ship Master of My Soul Survival of Self and the Fallacy of Ego Death 21:42

6M ago21:42

21:42

How often do we feel like our life has direction or lacks direction? The realization is that we are moving either way toward a perceived and conceived goal or end. A journey, a quest undertaken with the end in mind, even if don't have the skillset or the the map. Our ego is build and solidified by what we gather in our experience and aspects of ide…

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Ep 37 Conjunction Fallacy, Social Pressure and Advanced Hindsight Bias 21:27

6M ago21:27

21:27

When we see patterns where there aren't any. Where belief is swayed by social pressure, we have the potential to develop, conjunction fallacy. Believing things to be based on false information and at times social group pressure. Hindsight is always 20/20. But, what happens when we have feelings that things were correct? This is an example of an adv…

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Ep 36 The Gamble of Hunter Gathering and Modern Variable Payoff Schedule Addiction 24:24

6M ago24:24

24:24

When we were hunting in our primitive times there was no guarantee of success and payoff from finding and or successfully hunting food. The times that we succeeded, there was a reward pathway, Dopamine response signaling pleasure and ensuring motivation to repeat that behavior again. That is a powerful experience. In today's modern day, we have fou…

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Ep 35 Days of Future Past: How Your Emotional Memories Keep You Stuck In Unproductive Life Patterns 21:52

6M ago21:52

21:52

When we remember we are recalling a segment of our past in our life's timeline. Have you ever thought a certain way when you are stressed that you interpreted things negatively? Well, then you are human. What is changeable is our reactivity by training physical resilience and recognizing our proclivity to seek negatives to protect our future outcom…

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Ep 34 Psychological Distance, Dysphoric Recall, Euphoric Recall and Misbelief 27:52

6M ago27:52

27:52

When we recall we run the risk of reactivity to the nature of the memory. Is it euphoric and pleasant? Is is dysphoric and painful? These are the elements that often determine how close we hold our idea of self or ego in regards to the recollection. When we hold beliefs that have been assumed or accepted often there is a social component where we g…

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Ep 33 Placebo, Self Affirming Bias, and Psycho-Somatic Power of Visualization 27:20

7M ago27:20

27:20

The Late Psychologist and author Dr. Glen J. Morris wrote that "We follow our own Placebos". This is a daily walk in that much of what we do and how we do it is based on the beliefs we hold that often are founded in inaccuracy, misinterpretation and failure (on our part) to correct an in complete concept. Shakespeare's idea that all the world is a …

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Ep 32 Biology of Fear and Theories of Fear Behaviors that are Universal 27:04

7M ago27:04

27:04

There are several theories on fear and also the behaviors that arise from the stimulus that causes us and animals to shirk from danger and protect ourselves. At times we add narrative to make sense of understanding and may created ethics, guidelines and morals and more's that limit the negative effects of what fear would otherwise bring to bear in …

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Ep 31 The Art of Peace, the Art of War, Harmony in Conflict 28:45

7M ago28:45

28:45

The art of peace is a an encouragement to seek harmony in day to day things and to seek to apply the principle of "Ai" union and Wa, harmony in conflict. The highest expression of the art of war is to use influence and to never have to draw your sword. The way of understanding creates an opportunity to understand and to neutralize conflict by empat…

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Ep 30 Walking the Shadow Self. Bringing our Dark Survival Selves to the Light 30:13

7M ago30:13

30:13

Walking with the shadow self is a daily event that occurs when we meet obstacles and challenge in what we call our lives. The shadow self may be in the dark but not because it is bad or evil. Often it is mistakenly shunned and relegated to our more primitive more base ideas of what our shadow is. It is from where our feelings, emotions and passions…

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Episode 29 The Highway to Heaven, My Highway to Hell; Reward pathways, Dopamine, and the Cephalic Phase of Addiction 27:55

7M ago27:55

27:55

The cephalic phase of hunger extends to acquisition, seeking and hunting. By the visual recall alone will the body drive, seek and hunt to satiate a primal need to survive and to get survival level payoff/reward. By the same token it is the preceding spark that creates an anticipatory "high before the high" that if left unsatisfied can result in fe…

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Ep 28 Making the Dangerous Beautiful and Making the Beautiful Dangerous 27:13

7M ago27:13

27:13

Making the beautiful dangerous and making the dangerous beautiful is a principle that helps us understand how nature speaks to us of danger and risk but also about learning life giving and life preserving skills to a high level where they appear as art and indicate time-borne and repetition based skills. Feeling weak, or lacing in self control or l…

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Ep 26 Mirror Neurons, Motor Neurons, Vicarious Learning and Survival Level Social Value 25:44

7M ago25:44

25:44

Mirror neurons are closely related to motivation of motor neurons during observational, vicarious learning. We learn social more's and folkways by observing as much as by verbal communication. Much of what we learn that is survival level social value we learn by observing body language and facial expressions as much as by direct instruction. When w…

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Ep 27 The Conceptual Unknown, the Perceptual Unknown the Reality and the Narrative 22:52

7M ago22:52

22:52

The unknown is considered a product of a thinking process. Ask a person with anxiety, traumatic stress reactivity and PTSD and their description and definition of the unknown is different and much more real. There is a conceptual idea of the "unknown" and the real, felt experiential perceived aspect of unknown that is perceptual. The conscious know…

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Ep 25 Five Strategic Approaches to Manage Conflict in the External Environment 20:33

7M ago20:33

20:33

Conflict is a common event in social interactions that at times can lead to physical aggression and violence at the extreme. The five strategies stem from a martial methodology that was developed to shape the mindset for the highest good in mutual conflict. When one recognizes where conflict occurs, the 5 approaches can assist in neutralizing and p…

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Ep 24 The Power of Suggestion; the Most Proximal and Distal Suggestions and the Promise of Transformation 25:13

7M ago25:13

25:13

Suggestion is a powerful mode of creating influence, personal power and transformation within an individual. The fake it till you make it adage pales in comparison to what a well-placed suggestion can do in the mind and life of the suggestable person. To be suggestible does not mean lacking intelligence and gullible. We are suggestible not only to …

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Episode 23 Building Self Regulation Skills and Transfer of Training 20:44

7M ago20:44

20:44

Getting started in building self regulation skills can be hard. But, living with anger, anxiety, fear, reactivity and general discomfort knowing that these states will be recurrent and can make you feel bad by just thinking of it. It is best to get started, one skill at a time. Gain skill, then add a skill when you get comfortable with the prior sk…

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Episode 22 Power Perceived is Power Achieved, Power Conceived is Power Believed, 27:39

8M ago27:39

27:39

The role of Influence, is often called power in social situations and at work is considered authority in work situations. The three terms are often interchangeable in language but have far reaching impact in social interactions from discussion and convincing to destructive and violent displays that may start off as posturing or bravado. Confidence,…

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Episode 21 Observation and Suspension of Judgement; a Bridge to Insight and Understanding 29:59

8M ago29:59

29:59

Observation and being able to wait and suspend judgement are important skills to gain in self regulation whether it be a wooded outdoor environment or a more socialized interaction with people. Both require that we accurately interpret what we hear in our environment. These skills help us to become more skillful reckoners in interactions where we i…

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Episode 20 Do as I say, Not as I do. Levelling up your parental-child-peer communication. 34:23

8M ago34:23

34:23

This episode discusses the use of communication tools to prevent bad communication in domestic setting that far too often fall into arguing, yelling and intimidating tones and body language and even to the extremes of destructiveness and violence. The use of the tools of "getting down on their level" is not just a simplifying the message, it is a c…

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Episode 19 Dishonor, Saving Face, Death by Compassion and the Warrior's Walk 30:38

8M ago30:38

30:38

We often get stuck in social situations where our self image is at risk for compromise and we may believe that is potentially damaging and is a tangible terrible thing. When we realize that we are playing a socialized game of in-group and out-group dynamics that we feel trapped and unable to escape the socialized hamster wheel. Often we worry about…

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Ep 18 Uncanny Valley, Visual perception, Paradolia, Anthropomorphism and Faulty Beliefs 33:55

8M ago33:55

33:55

Visual perception is a large percentage of our day to day and moment to moment perceptual experience but is also prone to error under stress and high speed presentation of visual stimulus. The Uncanny valley was coined in 1970 as a response to the forward thinking of Japanese robotist Masaharu Mori when he hypothesized our response to increasingly …

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Episode 17 Stress induced Categorical thinking, Judgement and the Seeds of Prejudice 23:37

8M ago23:37

23:37

Categorical thinking is useful too when all assumptions of safety are met and we need to organize our world and the details of a task or job. When under stress or duress our best reasoning moves toward categorical thinking as an expedient to avoid wasting time and energy, especially during a situation with escalating stress. Often we become more ap…

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Episode 16 Ego, I, Me, Self, True self and the dispassionate observer 32:24

8M ago32:24

32:24

We identify with things in our world and Ego is the sensitive part of who we are when we interact with others and when we identify how I see and how I value myself. Ego is an idea and not the actual self, it is mentally constructed idea of my self image, the mask and person that wears the "Mask of the Polis" when socialize. Determining my actual "S…

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