S2 Ep1: Katie Norris! Season 2 begins! Rich is back! It's all happening!

Our Dads Died

Katie Norris is on the pod, and we're back with a brand new season of Our Dads Died! Rich returns to the "studio" for our pre- and post-show chats! It's everything you ever wanted! Except, like, I guess, your dad back. But in practice that was always going to be a big ask of a podcast. Go follow Katie on Insta: @katinenorris26 and follow us if you aren't @ourdadsdied! Show notes:

Summary

• Who has my ashes? We’re back, baby! 0:00
  • Tom wants to be cremated and wants who has his ashes to be a point of complete contention. He wants to leave lots of conflicting, written opinions to different people.
  • WE’RE BACK!
• Is Sinatra really a solid funeral track? 2:56
  • Frank Sinatra and Mr Brightside have a lot of fun at funerals (the transcription software came up with this gem and it made me laugh so I left it in). They have a couple of songs that people can't help but get into.
  • Tom has been to 13 funerals, and his first funeral was when he was 13.
  • Katie’s dad is from the silent generation. Having three older brothers, the oldest of whom is in his 50s.
  • The shame around having an old dad, because he was embarrassing as well, like he'd pick his brother up with pants on his head at school.
• Growing up in the same family as her dad. 8:36
  • Growing up with a 66-year-old man who was sent to boarding school at a young age and didn't meet teenage girls until he left.
  • Katie talks about her relationship with her ex-boyfriend, who was 29 years older than her and 29 years younger than her (again, the transcription software went haywire on this one and it really made me laugh).
  • Katie jokes that it would be nice if all of her exes would come to her funeral, but it's probably not going to happen.
  • Katie’s dad was a really bad farmer.
• The influence of Tom’s father. 14:24
  • Tom’s dad was obsessed with amateur dramatics, and his childhood is peppered with him being in the arts centre.
  • What roles his dad played that he liked or hated.
• Dancing in the Darkness, by John Spalding. 15:47
  • Rich talks about his father, Gilbert and Sullivan, the Pirates of Penzance, and how he was in the chorus of the play.
  • Katie shares her father's death in June 2021. He was ill for a long time during the pandemic, and his health deteriorated.
  • The shock of getting the phone call that her dad had died, and how he had been dying for a long time.
  • How the morning that she got the call that he was dying was like a relief, because it was no longer something to wait for.
• Woodland burials. 21:50
  • There is a woodland burial site near her family's home. It's a beautiful place, and it's environmentally friendly. They buried her dad in a wicker casket.
  • Her mom bought the pitch next to him for 50% off. She saved it for herself.
  • It's been over two years since her dad died. The hardest thing for her was coming home to an empty flat and not having her own family unit.
  • She started doing stand up soon after he passed away, and that's been life changing.
  • Katie talks about her cat, Atticus Finch, who she got on the first day of lockdown, and how it was life-changing.
  • Katie shares her thoughts on the cat lady stereotype.
• When people die. 28:07
  • When someone dies or is ill, it is easy to stop thinking of them as a human being, as a person with flaws and good things and bad things, and to expect them to be treated as a hero.
  • The importance of remembering the bad stuff as well as the good stuff.
  • The strangeness of who dad was as a person, and how he could drink for too long, including THREE PINTS OF LIME CORDIAL (wtf, rich) in one night for essentially no reason.
• How many people went to the funeral? 32:37
  • Katie’s has been a bridesmaid at five weddings. Rich wonders if funerals have become like weddings, where the first one is a big special occasion, and then when the last one dies, you have to go to another funeral.
  • Katie’s father passed away at 81.
  • Her dad had a cousin who was in his 80s and was very close to him. They spoke every day and grew up together. He would pretend to be a character.
  • Her dad was obsessed with ancestry DNA and tracking down his family trees.
• The duty of putting into the world what they were doing. 38:29
  • When someone dies, is there a duty to continue putting into the world what they were doing when they died?
  • Trying to carry on the legacy of Katie and Rich’s fathers.
  • Did the funeral provide closure?
• Laying him to rest in the woods. 41:36
  • Laying him to rest in such a beautiful setting, not too far away from home, and a very quick and ritualistic ceremony.
  • Quaker funerals.
  • Crematorium funerals are very regimented. People are forced out of the building quickly sometimes.
  • The party afterwards is good, but after the funeral, they had a massive rager at the house and then everyone sort of left.
  • Katie’s mum used to say that she was like her dad when she was a teenager. Now she's similar to him in a ‘horrible’ way.
• Toxic by Britney. 47:33
  • Three Blind Mmice, Titanic, Toxic by Britney, and Toxic by Katie.
  • Katie is performing at Angel Comedy Club in Angel, North London, on 14 September, doors open at 9:45pm, and the show may end up at the Edinburgh Fringe in 2024.
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THANKS FOR LISTENING, AND REMEMBER, DEATH COMES FOR US ALL... BUT IT COMES FOR YOU FIRST. Till next week!