1: Why Smart Women Stay in Dead-End Relationships with Megan Thoma

I Come First!

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In this inaugural episode, host Amie Barsky welcomes Megan Thoma, a renowned dating coach who specializes in helping women navigate the complexities of relationships. Megan shares her insights on breaking free from societal expectations, healing from toxic relationships, and recognizing the red flags and green flags in dating. She delves into the science behind why women often stay in relationships past their expiration date and discusses the concept of a "loveability level." The conversation also explores how early childhood experiences with caregivers influence adult relationships, the importance of defining personal values and standards in relationships, and practical advice on building self-trust and effectively communicating needs and desires in a relationship.

What We Discussed

00:01:23 - Megan's Journey into Becoming a Dating Coach

00:03:21 - Why We Choose to See the Good in People

00:06:03 - The Importance of Grace in Relationships

00:07:02 - Communicating Needs in Relationships

00:08:30 - Setting Standards and Values in Relationships

00:10:36 - The Role of Pheromones in Attraction

00:11:28 - Understanding Red Flags in Relationships

00:13:51 - The Impact of Familiarity in Relationships

00:15:41 - Building Self-Trust

00:17:27 - Listening to Your Body's Signals

00:19:00 - The Importance of Trusting Yourself

00:21:10 - Small Practices for Building Self-Trust

00:23:34 - Healing Old Patterns and Owning Your Voice

00:25:28 - Practicing Vulnerability and Communication

00:27:19 - The Importance of Expressing True Desires

00:29:27 - Practicing with Safe People

00:31:19 - The Power of Microscopic Truth in Communication

00:34:05 - The Importance of Vulnerability for Connection

00:36:05 - How to Connect with Megan Thoma

00:38:10 - Megan's Personal Practices for Self-Care

Memorable Guest Quotes

On Falling in Love with Potential:

"We excel at falling in love with potential due to our early experiences with inconsistent caregivers. As children, we cling to the hope that 'maybe someday' they will fulfill our needs. This pattern often continues into adulthood, where we find ourselves repeatedly drawn to potential rather than reality in our romantic relationships."

On Expressing Needs in Relationships:

"There's a difference between trying to change someone and expressing your needs. It's about communicating what makes you feel loved and seen. For instance, I value words of affirmation and small gestures like notes, which might not come naturally to everyone. But when I share this openly, it invites my partner to meet my needs in ways that are meaningful to me."

On Building Self-Trust:

"Building self-trust involves listening to your intuition and honoring the small, often overlooked internal prompts. Whether it's taking a different route or grabbing a coffee, these actions reinforce your ability to trust your own decisions. Over time, this practice strengthens your internal guidance system, making you more confident in your choices and more attuned to your true desires."

Connect with Megan

Megan’s Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/megan_thoma/

Megan’s Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/megan.thoma.7/

Download My Free Breathwork Practice

https://www.amiebarsky.com/free-breathwork

Connect With Amie

Website: https://amiebarsky.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amie-barsky/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amiebarskycoaching/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmieBarsky?sub_confirmation=1

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