The Pathology of Ghosting with David Berkowitz

TMI with Kevin Ryan

David Berkowitz is my long time friend, colleague, founder of Serial Marketer, and an all-around good guy that will never ghost you. In fact, David feels as though it’s important to write back to everyone — even if it’s just a brief reply. This week he joins me for a conversation on why people ghost, what to do about it, and why you don’t want to be a victim of ghosting karma. We also talk about our definition of being an agent of change, and how that doesn’t always align with what the company is trying to get out of its interview candidates.

Takeaways:

• Not only does David share a name with one of the most well known serial killers ever, aka the Son of Sam, but he used it to his advantage and Serial Marketer now takes the reins in Google search results when you type in his name.
• During the pandemic, it’s even harder to tell who is really “ghosting” you and who is just dealing with personal issues. It’s best to first not try and take it personally, and come from the perspective that maybe someone is dealing with some hardships.
• If you are sure you are being ghosted, it’s a likely sign that you dodged a bullet anyway. It may be a blessing in disguise to have someone not answer when they aren’t capable of having hard or uncomfortable conversations.
• It’s hard when friends ghost, but just downright unprofessional for roles such as recruiters or hiring managers to do it.
• It’s best not to ghost people even from the perspective that communicating back with them, even brief but respectfully, can lead to something good for you.
• The industry is enormous, but small enough that if you ghost, chances are you will see them in person at some point.
• Instead of ending phrases that close the door such as “hope you are well,” asking someone how they are doing in a 1:1 email will most likely yield better results.
• Even if the message or promotion isn’t a fit for him, David will still take the time to write back to the sender.
• You must draw boundaries when it comes to interviewing for a position and giving away full business and marketing plans. If they are looking for a consultant, be sure to get hired before you do all the work for free.

Quotes:

• “It’s sobering right now. A little bit of empathy does go far.” — D
• “The more opportunities I create for others, then that’s more fun. It just gives people that chance to get out there.” — D
• “When you put a whole bunch of good stuff out there, it comes back to you.” — K

Mentioned in This Episode:

LinkedIn — David Berkowitz Article

Serial Marketer