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Week Fifteen: 'Agnostic Anger' & Trying to Solve For It
Manage episode 313262526 series 3264529
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This week's conversation was recorded on January 26, the day Kobe died. Riley and I open the conversation by talking briefly about Kobe, but I don't think either one of us knew, in that moment, how much it would affect our emotions in the weeks to come, and how much it likely affected the argument we had on this day without our realizing it. You can probably hear it in our voices: tension, stress, confusion. We're arguing about a fight we had about how clean the apartment was, but what we're really talking about has to do with unspoken feelings of abandonment, emotion policing, and beneath all of that, grief. One particularly interesting event of this conversation is when Riley coins the term "agnostic anger," which is the type of aimless frustration that can be really difficult to deal with in a relationship. When your partner has agnostic anger, what are you supposed to do? Ignore it and let them figure it out on their own, or confront it, even if it has nothing to do with you? We still don't have a total answer, but this conversation marks our efforts to get closer to a solution.
Yours in faith and quarantine,
Caro Bambino, Queen of Stop Policing My Emotions Island
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