#31 Childless Not By Choice

Try Self-Love

Today Becky is interviewing Sheri Johnson, a coach who helps women who are childless not by choice to awaken their worth in a world that makes them feel inadequate. Her passion is inspiring these women to live full and joyful lives of meaning instead of lack.

She coaches women immersed in loss. Her clients vary from women who never found the right partner with whom to bear children; women who are married and cannot have children of their own; women who feel "less than" because they are not mothers.

Sheri suffered three miscarriages and 6 years of infertility before deciding with her husband not to continue attempting to bear children. Entering this new phase of life influenced her decision to change her coaching practice.

Sheri is offering a free quiz for you. Is your self-worth blocking your happiness as a childless woman? Once you finish the quiz you will unlock some other really cool free gifts. www.sherijohnson.ca

Some of her clients are still very much in grief. After emerging from the depths of that sadness, issues with self-worth show up. Sheri teachers them to feel their emotions in a safe space. There is no manual to grief. And when you have had grief before, that can compile. The feelings from a previous loss (of any sort) compounds into the next loss. It brings up all the feelings again.

Never compare yourself to others, especially with loss. The more you judge or feel judged, the less love you're going to give yourself and the less love that you will be able to give to others. If you don't feel you're worthy of love and care, you won't take care of yourself.

Sometimes a big loss can crack you open to healing. These cracks in the walls around your heart allow the light to come in. You are heartbroken when you lose someone, especially a baby or the dream of a baby, but that is when your heart is open to the healing God (or your higher being) can offer.

Sheri says she is a completely different person after her losses. She had the chance to put the pieces back together in a way that serves her better. The life she leads now, where she is able to serve women in this way, would never have been available to her without having gone through this journey.

Self-love is a practice. Just like a muscle you have to use it to make it stronger.

Your children could choose not to have children so that type of legacy is not a guarantee. Instead think of the legacy you can leave the world when you leave it. How did you leave this world a better place? Will it be a book, a piece of art, or maybe a contribution to whatever field you serve?

All women "mother" in different ways because we are natural nurturers. We have the innate drive to love, comfort and support those around us. This is another way to leave your legacy on others.

There is a beautiful life waiting for all women, whether they have children or not. This is available but you will need to take action. You are worthy. Motherhood does not equal worthiness and womanhood does not equal worthiness. We all have value and it is up to us to cultivate that self-worth through self-love.

When we find someone who understands what we have gone through, that is part of the healing. We are strong and resilient; when we learn from our trials you will then be able to offer others, as well.

We don't look back enough at what we have been through and what we have grown through. We deserve to celebrate and acknowledge that. All women deserve to be celebrated!