79. I am the container | with Bella

Tankespjärn with Helena Roth

Fifth and final conversation of the third season.

Wrapping it up by having two group conversations (trying to get seven people to settle on one date with commitments and other engagements as well as time zones to juggle is a bit like trying to herd cat’s. Not the easiest. Hence: two conversations!), but still… a door closes.

And another opens?

Or ‘!’?

(Yes. Another opens!)

A Bella-and-me-conversation wouldn’t be a Bella-and-me-conversation unless discernment was part of it. True for this one too. As Bella is in a state of flux, she’s…

“… trying to establish positive rituals for myself, that feel like they feed me. Trying to do so neither at my expense, nor at the expense of those around me. Navigating how to do it in a way that it doesn't convey conflict, but rather conveys collaboration, which I find challenging sometimes.” ~ Bella

Which, of course, had us off to the races.

Habits. Mindful, or mindless? Might we need a mix of both?

“Sometimes I need a little bit of mindless habit too. Because everything in my work is about assessing the moment, appreciating what is there, what potential is there, what limitations are there, both mine and the other persons. And it's really an intense being-present kind of thing.” ~ Bella

How do habits relate to rituals and traditions? Or ceremonies?

Are they filled with life-force? Or does life-force arise because we do them?

Are they mine? What do they give me? What do I give them? Why do I do them? And how?

“Being the container.

Not being contained by others, by conditioning, by should’s and societal norms and whatnot. Not being contained but being a container for myself. A container for what is there, which is another way of asserting freestanding Yes and Noes.

When I'm the container, I'm the one who says Yes or No. Based on my discernment right now, what's valid, what's relevant, what's emotionally appropriate? How's my heart right now? What am I containing? How am I doing that thing? How much can I take? What can I harbor today and what can't I harbor today?” ~ Helena

As always, a meandering conversation, gentle and soft, and still filled with tankespjärn. What a lovely combination that is! It’s like a delicious meal, one where many opposites are present. Sweetness as well as salt. Smooth textures, and crunchy ones. A bit of heat, tempered by a rich umami taste.

The table is set, so I invite you to dig in!

Links:

Bella (and some more of her music)

77. Conversations that help me be more me | with Luke Aymon

Twilight retreat with@wildherbarista and@whentheblackbirdsings_

Yuval Noah Harari, author of Sapiens