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39 | On People Pleasing
Manage episode 431639996 series 3459665
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In this live-recorded episode, we explore the pervasive issue of people-pleasing, its roots, impacts, and the paths to overcoming it.
This behavior, often rooted in a desire to be liked and accepted, can have profound impacts on both our personal and professional lives. Join me for personal stories, client experiences, and actionable steps to help you reclaim your voice and set healthier boundaries. Learning to love and accept ourselves, flaws and all, is a vital part of the journey towards breaking free from this behavior.
If you're ready to reclaim your voice, tune in to this enlightening episode. It's time to prioritize your own well-being and create a life that truly reflects who you are.
GEMS DROPPED
“People pleasing is symptomatic of feeling unseen, going for long periods of your life, probably in your youth, probably having to deal with some of our traumas, where we've been unseen. “
“I want to be really clear that people pleasing is not the same thing as being ”weak”, or, not having a perspective or being passive. Some of the most hard hitting, ambitious, aggressive, in all the best ways, women that I know also identify as being people pleasers. Two things can be true at the same time, y'all. People pleasing is not the same thing as playing second fiddle and always taking a backseat.”
“You are in the driver's seat of the choices you make, no matter what choices you make. This podcast, Ambition Without Compromise, is about you designing what ambition looks like. And I think oftentimes when you really think about it, one of the most ambitious things, if I'm honest, that a black woman in this world could do is to decide against all odds that she is prioritizing just her basic well-being over anything else. Over career, over accolades, over anything. And that could look a lot of different ways.”
“Our bodies are our bodies. We are still real flesh and blood human beings. We are not supernatural. We are not meant to take on all the burdens of the world. We have got to stop convincing ourselves that, like, I can hold it. They're not built like me, so I guess I better handle it. Like, at some point, it will catch up with you. 1000% guaranteed and on that day, you won't be able to always just walk it back.”
“I think all of this boils down to a very fundamental need that all of us have as humans, which is unconditional love. It's like the ooey gooey center of it all. I'm talking about leadership. I'm talking about, you know, showing up in spaces and holding things and pleasing folks. And you gotta please your investors, you gotta please your team, you gotta please your clients, you gotta please your parents, you gotta please your extended family, you gotta please your spouse, you gotta please your kids. Right? But when we operate like this, I think a big part of it is that we move into circumstances, in general, in life, where we just don't expect unconditional love. We don't know what that looks like. We have not been taught that and not in a blanketed way. And it's what we crave most, where it's just like, I can be me and I'll still be accepted. I can want what I need too, and still be loved. I’m deserving of it all.”
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