221. Q+A: “I’m Not Over My First Breakup...”

Honeydew Me

In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.

The Question: "I’m in my mid-20s now, but I still feel like my breakup from high school is affecting the way I show up in relationships. Like… my attachment style, my trust issues, the way I react when someone pulls away. It all kind of traces back to that first heartbreak. Shouldn’t I be over it by now? It feels silly sometimes, but it also feels so real. Am I broken or is this just… a thing?"

What We Cover in This Episode:

• The breakup that still haunts you (yes, that one). We revisit the heartbreaks that shaped us and why your pain from that relationship is still valid.

• Why your younger self didn’t need to “know better." A compassionate reframe for those moments when you look back and think, “Why didn’t I know better?” (Spoiler: it wasn’t your job to know. It was your job to do the best you could with what you had.)

• Validation is not weakness—it’s healing. We talk about why needing to feel seen in your pain isn’t dramatic, it’s human.

• Unpacking what breakups really bring up (hint: it’s not just about your ex). From attachment wounds to trust issues, we explore how heartbreak echoes in other areas of life.

• How to offer yourself the compassion you never got. Step-by-step reflections on how to talk to yourself like someone you deeply care about.

• Letting go with grace and a little bit of rage. We normalize the complexity of closure and what it actually takes to move forward.

• Creating rituals that honor your healing. Whether it’s a playlist, a letter, or a literal ceremony, we explore ways to mark the end of a chapter.

• Why your sadness makes sense. A gentle reminder that you don’t have to defend or downplay your grief—especially when no one else understood it at the time.

Resources:

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